I grab a cup of the Elixir and look out the window.
So why does God allow “procedures”, “emergencies”, and outright “catastrophes”? Why does He let that stuff get into my life at all, let alone right now?
He’s God, right?
Another sip of the Elixir.
Huh.
And there’s the rub. I want MY God to be a magic wand waving magnanimously over my life, driving out darkness, despair, pain, discomfort, and, yes, even the consequences of my actions.
I want MY God to make it "right" – as far as it applies to ME.
At its worst, life should at least be fair.
Huh.
And why do I want it fair? So I don’t get ripped off for my fair share. And why do I demand my fair share from God? Why am I reeeeeeeally ticked off when I think I’m getting hosed outta my fair share?
Ouch. Sometimes this Elixir works a little too well. That and the Holy Spirit. And the Word.
Answer: I don’t trust God. Oh, I trust Him with eternity. But not with today. Not with right now. He could mess it up. Whaddaya mean could? He IS messing it up because I’m not happy. I’m not comfortable. I’m not . . .
I refill the cup, trying to bide my time; trying to avoid the inevitable confrontation with Someone a whole lot smarter and stronger than myself.
And the fact that He’s always right makes my rebellious anger seem even more . . . well, stupid.
I guess if He’ll die for me, He’d do anything for me - like letting me go through this so I can be closer to Him . . . which is the best place I can be.
Well.
Okay then.
I still don’t like it, this thing I’m in.
But . . . okay.