Walking past the office manager, she stops me by saying,
"Here's your check".
I was used to "1st & 15th" payroll dates for the last 20 years.
Now I get paid every two weeks.
Don't have clue when.
They just give me an envelope.
Like I got yesterday morning.
On the way home I noticed Phlegm, our 2003 Taurus, is getting prrreeeeetty low on fuel.
I really want to gas up and carbo up at the convenience store in the little town where I work but I gotta get the funds into the bank first.
The U.S. Gov't can dive into deficit spending to the tune of trillions of dollars.
That's the same Gov't that says I getta go to jail for doing the same thing.
It's a felony to write checks I can't cover.
A felony.
And felons can't vote or own firearms.
But they can get Congressional and Presidential positions.
Good work if you can get it,
I guess.
Sooooo I make it home last night without hitchhiking.
Before going to bed, I write out a deposit ticket and put the check on top of it along with a note.
The note informs the Wife to get this into the Bank ASAP in the morning.
I've been at work about an hour or so when the iPhone the DAGU (Daughter All Grown Up) got me starts to growl and buzz.
It's the Wife.
She's texting me a message.
"This is a debit advice.
Not a check.
$$$ is already in the Bank."
The money was in the Bank even before I got the envelope.
And I stressed out about it driving to work and back.
Lusted in my heart for a bag of chips and a coke.
And stressed out driving to work this morning, wondering if I'd make it there and back.
And the money was already in the Bank.
Duh.
Double-Duh.
My evening cup of the Elixir of Knowledge warmly nudges this morning's revelation into a different light.
Oh.
Noooo.
No, I - do I really?
Huh.
Guess so.
Nuts.
Many times I impatiently "waited" for Him to meet a need while using my non-existent resources to "do something about it".
Worrying about it.
Fretting.
Stewing.
Anxiously striving in my self-inflicted poverty, living niggardly in my egocentric world of pouting self-righteousness.
Getting ticked at Him for not coming through for me.
And He already had.
I just didn't trust Him enough to act on His leading. His promise.
I had to work it out first, trusting myself to take care of it by my own effort.
Wow.
That's beyond Double-Duh, eh?
It's so dumb even Alfred E. Neuman is laughing at me.
And according to Mad Magazine,
he's a complete moron.
Oh, maaaaaaannn...
So what does that make me?